I spend quite a bit of time with our little grandjoys. Each week, I dedicate one day to spend with them. Some weeks we get ‘bonus’ days. These come when someone might be too sick to go to school or to their childcare provider, or when Kaitlyn and Matt have extra work commitments. Once in a while, it takes some fancy footwork on this end, and often a couple of late nights working on our own work to make the timing happen, but I choose to say yes whenever I possibly can. These days of little boys are short. I do not take them for granted and I make it my mission to find joy in every one of them.
Most of the time it’s not hard. Andy, at two, and Ben, now six, never cease to have me in stitches over some comment they make. Sometimes, the days are more challenging. But always they are precious. Last week this was my little side-splitter with Andy:
Me: Andy, I hear you’ve been singing some songs at your day home.
Sweet Andy: Yes.
Me: What kind of songs do you sing there?
Sweet Andy: Oh, just cwrappy ones.
Me (trying not to fall on the floor laughing) (Crappy?!!! Where in the world did he come up with this word?)
Me: What kind?
And then he showed me with his little hands. Clappy. Clappy ones!
For every day we spend together there is something worth noting. Often, it’s something funny. The laughter comes easy with these two and enriches our lives beyond anything we could have imagined. But sometimes, the thing that stands out in the day isn’t funny, rather it’s a thing that really makes me think. Last week, while driving with Ben, such a moment unfolded.
As we drove down the onramp to the freeway, Ben noticing all the different vehicles and their makes, commented from the back seat, ‘There’s a vehicle not doing what its name says.’
Huh?
We looked to our left and saw a large empty car carrier driving past. Sure enough, while its name may have been Car Carrier, it was not carrying a single car. Ben had just said it as a statement, with no judgement. But later that evening I found myself judging. My mind was turning over with thoughts of how many names we use to describe ourselves, and how sometimes we are definitely not doing what our names say.
At first, thinking about how we don’t always do what our name says, I found it easiest to judge others. It’s always easy to see how others could improve themselves. It didn’t take long, however, to realize that I too, am guilty of not always doing what my name says.
For instance, most of us would say we are a friend. This is a name we proudly give ourselves. We were taught how to be a good friend. We were even taught what it means to be a friend. And yet, how often are we a bit too tired to make a phone call that might just make a significant difference in the life of one of our friends? Or how often do we assume we will have more time next week, next month, next summer, next year, to make a plan to visit a friend? Or how often is it that when our friend is telling us of a problem, do we follow with one of our own, instead of just listening and supporting. It’s tough to admit that while we call ourselves Friend, we don’t always do what our name says.
Each of us has many, many names we go by. We are CEO, manager, sister, father, advocate, friend, plumber, consultant, teacher, mother, brother, athlete, politician, farmer, gramma. Of course, it’s impossible to do what our name says all the time, but there are definitely times when we could, and perhaps should, focus on doing what our name says.
When the empty car carrier drove past us, I mentioned to Ben that he might have just dropped off a load, or perhaps he was on his way to get a load. But the truth is this, when a big vehicle drives past, a vehicle that is so clearly a car carrier, and that is so clearly capable of being a good car carrier, and it’s not doing the very job its name says it does, it can leave a little boy feeling a bit disappointed. I’m guessing it’s the same disappointment the rest of us feel when a boss doesn’t do what their name is, or a mother or father, or a doctor, or a carpenter, or a brother, or a friend.
This week I’m practicing doing what my name says, and if I’m a car carrier, I plan to have a full load of cars.
Elizabeth is a certified professional Leadership Coach, and the owner of Critchley Coaching. She is the founder and president of the Canadian charity, RDL Building Hope Society. She works with corporations, non-profits and the public sector, providing leadership coaching. She creates and facilitates custom workshops for all sizes of groups and has expertise in facilitating Strategic Plans for organizations. Contact Elizabeth to learn how to do what your name says.
Most of the time it’s not hard. Andy, at two, and Ben, now six, never cease to have me in stitches over some comment they make. Sometimes, the days are more challenging. But always they are precious. Last week this was my little side-splitter with Andy:
Me: Andy, I hear you’ve been singing some songs at your day home.
Sweet Andy: Yes.
Me: What kind of songs do you sing there?
Sweet Andy: Oh, just cwrappy ones.
Me (trying not to fall on the floor laughing) (Crappy?!!! Where in the world did he come up with this word?)
Me: What kind?
And then he showed me with his little hands. Clappy. Clappy ones!
For every day we spend together there is something worth noting. Often, it’s something funny. The laughter comes easy with these two and enriches our lives beyond anything we could have imagined. But sometimes, the thing that stands out in the day isn’t funny, rather it’s a thing that really makes me think. Last week, while driving with Ben, such a moment unfolded.
As we drove down the onramp to the freeway, Ben noticing all the different vehicles and their makes, commented from the back seat, ‘There’s a vehicle not doing what its name says.’
Huh?
We looked to our left and saw a large empty car carrier driving past. Sure enough, while its name may have been Car Carrier, it was not carrying a single car. Ben had just said it as a statement, with no judgement. But later that evening I found myself judging. My mind was turning over with thoughts of how many names we use to describe ourselves, and how sometimes we are definitely not doing what our names say.
At first, thinking about how we don’t always do what our name says, I found it easiest to judge others. It’s always easy to see how others could improve themselves. It didn’t take long, however, to realize that I too, am guilty of not always doing what my name says.
For instance, most of us would say we are a friend. This is a name we proudly give ourselves. We were taught how to be a good friend. We were even taught what it means to be a friend. And yet, how often are we a bit too tired to make a phone call that might just make a significant difference in the life of one of our friends? Or how often do we assume we will have more time next week, next month, next summer, next year, to make a plan to visit a friend? Or how often is it that when our friend is telling us of a problem, do we follow with one of our own, instead of just listening and supporting. It’s tough to admit that while we call ourselves Friend, we don’t always do what our name says.
Each of us has many, many names we go by. We are CEO, manager, sister, father, advocate, friend, plumber, consultant, teacher, mother, brother, athlete, politician, farmer, gramma. Of course, it’s impossible to do what our name says all the time, but there are definitely times when we could, and perhaps should, focus on doing what our name says.
When the empty car carrier drove past us, I mentioned to Ben that he might have just dropped off a load, or perhaps he was on his way to get a load. But the truth is this, when a big vehicle drives past, a vehicle that is so clearly a car carrier, and that is so clearly capable of being a good car carrier, and it’s not doing the very job its name says it does, it can leave a little boy feeling a bit disappointed. I’m guessing it’s the same disappointment the rest of us feel when a boss doesn’t do what their name is, or a mother or father, or a doctor, or a carpenter, or a brother, or a friend.
This week I’m practicing doing what my name says, and if I’m a car carrier, I plan to have a full load of cars.
Elizabeth is a certified professional Leadership Coach, and the owner of Critchley Coaching. She is the founder and president of the Canadian charity, RDL Building Hope Society. She works with corporations, non-profits and the public sector, providing leadership coaching. She creates and facilitates custom workshops for all sizes of groups and has expertise in facilitating Strategic Plans for organizations. Contact Elizabeth to learn how to do what your name says.
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