Life coaching has changed my life. The change has all been positive; the journey has not always been smooth or easy. It has most definitely been worth it. And I know for sure that the best stories in life do not come from days or events where everything has run perfectly as planned. In my blog, I hope to offer you tidbits to ponder. I’ll share some personal stories and I’ll give you some food for thought. I hope you will laugh. I hope to give you pause. Once in awhile I’ll even challenge your thinking.
The kind of coaching that I do is called Co-Active coaching. Karen Kimsey House and Ann Betz explained in their book, “Integration: The Power of Being Co-Active”, that the Co can be explained as the connection part of our living. This is the ‘being’ part. This is how we are with others. The question to ask yourself here is ‘Who am I being as I take part in this activity?’ The Active part is the part of our life when we are ‘doing’. These are the tasks and activities that we fill our days, weeks and years of our lives with. The hypen in the middle is finding the balance between our doing and our being. It is neither being obsessed with getting our things done, nor is it ignoring our responsibilities so that we can be all touchy feely. It is much more like dancing on the hyphen.
In my life I was always a very, very good doer. I could make a list and get it checked off like there was no tomorrow. What coaching taught me was to be present to how I was being in the midst of my organized efficiency. It also taught me that I am fully in charge of who I want to be during any situation. This learning has been invaluable to me. I now consciously choose how I want to show up in all areas of my life. It is not to say that I have become perfect at it, for I still find myself with plenty of room to grow. But it has given me a new way to define success at the end of the day.
Success used to feel like a clean counter top and a fully checked off list. I now give myself permission to feel successful if I have a sink full of dishes, but I have been kind and present to someone who needed me. And just so you know, I still love a clean countertop!
My question for you this week is, “Who are you choosing to be?” Ask yourself this off and on, in many different situations. You might surprise yourself with what you discover.
I am hoping to find myself choosing thankfulness this weekend. Our house will be filled with our children and their partners, extended family and friends, lots of food and likely a few messy countertops!
Happy Thanksgiving to each of you!